Roughly twice a year, I sit down with an oracle card deck I've used for a very long time and do a comprehensive card pull for the next six months. I did this over the weekend, and I want to tell you what came up, because it connects to something I shared back in the winter, and to what I've been writing about lately.

At the start of the year, I wrote about a card I'd pulled for the query "where I am in present time?" It was the Hanged Man,

There's a moment that catches almost everyone I work with off guard, and it tends to arrive right after they've done the brave thing.

They've made the decision. They've stopped waiting, stopped tolerating the almost-right, finally chosen the truer thing. And they come to a session expecting to feel lighter, because that's what you're promised, isn't it? That once you choose yourself,

There is a particular kind of fine that doesn't feel like anything is wrong, and that's exactly why it's so hard to catch. The numbers are steady, the calendar fills, the work gets done, and from the outside, and even from most angles on the inside, everything looks like it's working. So you keep going, because why wouldn't you?

I've been noticing how many people live in a state of constant reaction now. Every ping gets answered the moment it lands. Every question gets handled on the spot. Someone brings something up at dinner and the phone comes out, the call gets made, right then. The reason is almost always some version of the same thing. I just want to get it done so it's out of my head. And in the next breath, the same people wonder why they're so exhausted all the time.

Most of the people I work with don't come to me knowing what they want. They come to me saying the opposite.

"I don't know what I want."

It usually comes with a little embarrassment, because they feel like they should know by now. These are accomplished people. They've built businesses, raised families, led teams. They're the ones everyone…

I've written about my Long Covid journey and the writing practice that healed me physically. But there's a piece I haven't shared yet, and it changed me more than the healing itself. I want to tell you what that actually looked like for me, because it didn't arrive the way I expected it to.

A simple framework for understanding where you actually are in a change process, and why the messy middle isn't a sign that something is wrong with you.

About five months ago, I dusted off my Tarot of the Spirit oracle deck and pulled four cards. I told you about the first one — the Death Card — in my last post. It pointed to a major transformation. That I'd need to go into it alone. That I'd face my darkest fears first before new ways of living could accommodate who I was becoming.

But I didn't tell you about the second card.

Card #2 in that pull represented: "What am I not seeing?" And the card that came up was The Hanged Man.

A few months ago, I was neck-deep in knowing that something needed to shift in my business. I'd been feeling it for a while — that quiet, persistent pull toward something more aligned, more authentically me. But I wanted some additional guidance around it, so I dusted off my Tarot of the Spirit oracle deck and pulled 4 cards.

I create intentions for each card I pull, and Card #1 represented "What I am currently seeing."

I pulled the Death Card